It has happened. The thing that I’ve been dreading, the thing I have been taking so many precautions to avoid.
I’m sick.
Getting sick seems inevitable when you travel for extended periods of time. The body is used to a set of foods, and then all of a sudden you’re eating something completely new and different. My friend who is in Peru through the same program as me informed me that the three countries that a traveller is most likely to get sick from are Egypt, Peru and India. (Inner Monologue: ...damnit.) So I wait for this storm to pass over.
I've been here for a month now. I've learned so much about Canada, India and myself already. So many things that I can't even articulate yet.
I've decided that Indian life is influenced most by food, family and religion. Everything revolves around these things. People always eat, are with/close to/talk to their families and people take pride in their family, and everywhere I go, I see temples, shrines to various gods and deities. Throughout the day I hear chanting (Which is quite eerie at 4:30 in the morning...) from the nearby temple. My host mom everyday goes to that temple to pray...it's...refreshing... to see people who still believe in religion and practice it daily. People have a high sense of spirituality here, and I think because they give themselves enough time through the day to reflect, they really have a good idea of who they are.
In Canada and the U.S. life is influenced by time, material goods and ourselves. We always have a place to rush to it seems. Our life is run by a schedule of some sort. We spend so much time at school and on homework so we can get into university so we can get ourselves a good paying job so we can buy a bigger car, house, TV and a smaller iPod and cell phone. We judge people by their material possessions they have. We think all these things make us happy and our material goods define who we are. And - we are happy and we know who we are. To a point. But we have no idea who we could be. If we stepped away from our cell phones and TV's and looked within ourselves... if we could spend time during the day to just reflect...I think we'd find a whole lot more to who we are and who we could possibly be.
Before I came to India, I knew I was an over-emotional person. But srsly...I cry.so.much. And it's usually over nothing. Like today I received a letter from my dad in the mail and I cried for about a half an hour. I wasn't even sad, I was just full of an emotion and I cried. If I'm filled with any emotion to a certain point, I'll just cry. It's really awesome and my host parents think I'm terribly depressed all the time, I'm sure.
Time has passed in such a strange way. The days are so long, but yet the minute I wake up the next day, the previous day doesn't even feel like it happened. This month has flown by and I'm sure that's what will happen to the other ten. But even time before... everything passed a month ago seems like a vivid dream that I can't decide if it was real or not. Canada, silence, hearing my friends voices, laughing until I cry...all things that I can't even picture properly.
I've learned so far that I'm grateful for being a Canadian citizen, born into a clean "developed" country where there isn't much poverty at all. No matter where I look here, I see people living in standards that... just...shouldn't exist. It breaks my heart that I have everything that I could possibly want in the world, and people here don't even have clean water.
Also, you know who you are, when you know where you are. I had a good idea of who Nisha Khan the Canadian in London, Ontario was. But Nisha Khan, the Indian in the small town of Yavatmal? Who the hell is that? I'm excited to know, but not excited for the stressful journey to know.
I can't even decide what I am; happy or sad with my decision to come to India. I left everything I knew of myself, the world and everything for a place so unknown and different. All these bad things are happening to me, and yet, when I think about Aafreen or just how Indian's aren't run by the clock...the bug bites and the general discomfort and uncleanliness don't seem to matter. Time is slow here. People take their time. It's not rushed like it is in Canada. I remember so many times last year (especially) just breaking down because of all the deadlines and things I had to do, and how all I really wanted for a break; A break from being run by the clock. I have that now, so I'm grateful.
I’m sick.
My body is punishing me to for changing its eighteen year old routine, habits and schedule. I’m putting new foods with new bacteria in it, breathing in air that’s the equivalent of smoking a pack of cigarettes a day, and being stressed out, which always helps keep the immune system running healthily.
Being sick away from your mother. It's like death is coming.
I don’t want to details about this, but eating is a strenuous task. I’m having a hard time swallowing things. When I try and swallow, I just end up gagging. It’s not helpful when I’m trying to ensure my host mother that I like her food. (And then the many trips to the bathroom…)
Getting sick seems inevitable when you travel for extended periods of time. The body is used to a set of foods, and then all of a sudden you’re eating something completely new and different. My friend who is in Peru through the same program as me informed me that the three countries that a traveller is most likely to get sick from are Egypt, Peru and India. (Inner Monologue: ...damnit.) So I wait for this storm to pass over.
Reflection Time
(I give you permission to skip to the next post if my melodramatic feelings bore you)
I've decided that Indian life is influenced most by food, family and religion. Everything revolves around these things. People always eat, are with/close to/talk to their families and people take pride in their family, and everywhere I go, I see temples, shrines to various gods and deities. Throughout the day I hear chanting (Which is quite eerie at 4:30 in the morning...) from the nearby temple. My host mom everyday goes to that temple to pray...it's...refreshing... to see people who still believe in religion and practice it daily. People have a high sense of spirituality here, and I think because they give themselves enough time through the day to reflect, they really have a good idea of who they are.
In Canada and the U.S. life is influenced by time, material goods and ourselves. We always have a place to rush to it seems. Our life is run by a schedule of some sort. We spend so much time at school and on homework so we can get into university so we can get ourselves a good paying job so we can buy a bigger car, house, TV and a smaller iPod and cell phone. We judge people by their material possessions they have. We think all these things make us happy and our material goods define who we are. And - we are happy and we know who we are. To a point. But we have no idea who we could be. If we stepped away from our cell phones and TV's and looked within ourselves... if we could spend time during the day to just reflect...I think we'd find a whole lot more to who we are and who we could possibly be.
Before I came to India, I knew I was an over-emotional person. But srsly...I cry.so.much. And it's usually over nothing. Like today I received a letter from my dad in the mail and I cried for about a half an hour. I wasn't even sad, I was just full of an emotion and I cried. If I'm filled with any emotion to a certain point, I'll just cry. It's really awesome and my host parents think I'm terribly depressed all the time, I'm sure.
Time has passed in such a strange way. The days are so long, but yet the minute I wake up the next day, the previous day doesn't even feel like it happened. This month has flown by and I'm sure that's what will happen to the other ten. But even time before... everything passed a month ago seems like a vivid dream that I can't decide if it was real or not. Canada, silence, hearing my friends voices, laughing until I cry...all things that I can't even picture properly.
I've learned so far that I'm grateful for being a Canadian citizen, born into a clean "developed" country where there isn't much poverty at all. No matter where I look here, I see people living in standards that... just...shouldn't exist. It breaks my heart that I have everything that I could possibly want in the world, and people here don't even have clean water.
Also, you know who you are, when you know where you are. I had a good idea of who Nisha Khan the Canadian in London, Ontario was. But Nisha Khan, the Indian in the small town of Yavatmal? Who the hell is that? I'm excited to know, but not excited for the stressful journey to know.
I can't even decide what I am; happy or sad with my decision to come to India. I left everything I knew of myself, the world and everything for a place so unknown and different. All these bad things are happening to me, and yet, when I think about Aafreen or just how Indian's aren't run by the clock...the bug bites and the general discomfort and uncleanliness don't seem to matter. Time is slow here. People take their time. It's not rushed like it is in Canada. I remember so many times last year (especially) just breaking down because of all the deadlines and things I had to do, and how all I really wanted for a break; A break from being run by the clock. I have that now, so I'm grateful.
I guess that's it for now. I love you so much and if you could all do me a favour... Find your parents, give them a hug and tell you that you love them and you're grateful for the life that they set up for you.
...That was a lot of words. Here's a picture.
A Hindu woman with her puja (The plate that has religious stuff on it. I don't know much about it)
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